Consent

Where there is no consent there is only abuse…

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This is a point that I have repeated throughout the trilogy. While constantly being underlined it is only when I give myself, rather than one of my characters, the final say at the end of Book 3; The Journey Home that I provide the fullest definition I could. I had to wait this long, as to do so earlier would run the risk of spoiling the major revelation that finally comes out about Ania's past and goes a long way to explaining how she sees herself and the world around her.

 

Firstly, let me define consent as I have done in the text of my book:

• if somebody is to say yes it means , whatever they say

• if somebody it doesn’t mean yes

• if somebody says yes it means

• if somebody (for whatever reason, which includes their own choice to take drugs or get drunk), or means

 

It really is as simple as that.

 

Please remember that I have made a distinction between #MeToo and Consent as in #MeToo situations oftentimes the predator doesn’t even give the person he (usually he) targets an opportunity to say “No”.

 

Within the novels I have done my best to illustrate how consent works and while I have pushed the boundaries as far as possible with two exceptions, I have remained within the character’s boundaries. This is best illustrated towards the end of Book 1: The Confession when Ania pushes things to an extreme. Dominika’s final comment afterwards was, ‘Make no mistake, Ania was in complete control all the time’, even if superficially it might have seemed very different.

The first of the two exceptions appeared in Book 2: The Hard Road Back when Ania is caught by surprise by something that happens and is initially upset about it. Then retrospectively she realised that had she been asked to consent that she would have freely done so. This in fact makes the comparison – as used in the novel – with a surprise birthday party particular apt.

 

The second exception comes up in Book 3; The Journey Home (yet to be published) during an encounter when Ania actually loses the ability to say ‘No’, and thus by my definition, without an active uncoerced ‘Yes’ It becomes ‘No’ by default. Ania simply got out of her depth and as I have written in the #MeToo discussion, while the encounter served other functions, its main purpose was to provide a platform for the conversations that came the next day.

 

My aspiration is that as a result of reading my novels ideas about consent will be clearer as will the need to take personal responsibility and probably more than anything it will get people talking about it. In turn this will serve to increase awareness and understanding.